Letters to Heaven
Grief is a journey that each person experiences differently and strategies which work for one person, may be less effective for someone else. There is no specific time limit on grief either, which we understand.
One way which may bring comfort through the grief, is the act of writing down feelings or sharing thoughts on paper, whether that is on the day of an important anniversary or any other time of the year.
The story of Letters to Heaven
The first memorial post box was installed in Gedling Crematorium near Nottingham and was the idea of nine-year-old Matilda Handy, whose mother, Leanne, is Memorial Advisor there.
Leanne’s father passed away in 2003 and her mother, who Matilda enjoyed a very loving relationship with, passed away in 2017.
Leanne said: “Matilda was always saying she wished we could send Mamma and Grandad birthday and Christmas cards for them to read. She was four when my mum died, and never met my dad and wished we could still send them birthday and Christmas cards for them to read. I then saw an article in a newspaper about a postman who found a letter in a Leicester post box written by an eight-year-old to her father in Heaven and we thought that perhaps we could have a post box at the crematorium.”
Following a period of planning, Leanne arranged for that first memorial post box to be installed at Gedling Crematorium just before Christmas 2022 and within a few weeks more than 100 messages had been posted in it.
Leanne said: “Following the installation of the post box at Gedling Crematorium, we had some amazing comments from members of the community about the comfort they have gained from writing letters and cards. Matilda and I were delighted when we learned that Westerleigh Group, the parent organisation of Gedling Crematorium, was going to install similar boxes at all its crematoria, so that people all over the country could use them. I feel very proud and both Matilda and I are so pleased that people are using these post boxes and taking some comfort from them, as another way of feeling connected to their loved ones.”
Our post boxes
Located within West Cemetery and Stephenson Way Cemetery, the white ‘letters to heaven’ post boxes enable people to write letters, cards and messages to those they have lost, and ‘post them’.
The post boxes were purchased and donated by Community Spirit and installed by the Town Council. Community Spirit trustee, Joanne Jones, said: “writing letters can help people with the bereavement process. We have a lot of people now who don’t necessarily have a grave, but they’ve got somewhere to come where they can put their thoughts and feelings down and send them to loved ones.”
What happens to the letters?
Every letter put into our memorial post boxes is treated with complete confidentiality and sensitivity.
They are stored securely and are never opened or read. The post box is not owned or serviced by Royal Mail, so no address or stamp is needed on any letters or cards put into it.
Using an innovative and eco-friendly method, we can turn the letters into compost, which is then used in our memorial gardens.
Whilst it is understandable that we are unable to keep the letters indefinitely, our thoughtful and sensitive process ensures that they never leave the site where they were posted and the very special soil, which is created from the letters, helps enhance the ecosystem of our beautiful grounds for all to enjoy.
Coping with grief
We hope that visiting our grounds and posting a letter to your loved one into our post box will bring you comfort each time you visit.
We understand that coming to terms with the loss of your loved one will be a personal journey which will consist of achieving a series of smaller and bigger milestones. We hope that the memorial post box will be one of them.
You may also find it helpful to browse additional resources available from other organisations which support the bereaved: –
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